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The Walls We Build

Recently on my way back home from college my friend and I had an enlightening tete-a-tete.Enlightening for me to be precise.Because Her and I have been friends for almost 8 months now,and I usually let my guard down once I befriend people,but      after the conversation she commented,”I never thought you would be such an emotionally enlightening person,I always took you as an incessant shopper whose life revolved around malls,parties and socializing.I always thought you were the bully and not the bullied”(and basically deriving an assumption that I am a shallow b*tch).

That got me thinking…(its bound to)…and I am unabashedly sharing this incident with you is BECAUSE:

I have felt the pain of a heart break.And NO,it is NOT just a beau who can break your heart.For the kid who waited and peeped from behind the curtains of the stage to see if her/his parents have arrived,only to be dismayed to have noticed the seats vacant the entire time of the recital.Or the sibling who refused to solve your problem and bullied you,or the BFF who promised she/he would be there in your times of need and did not.I might be missing out a whole bunch of instances but you get the gist.Hearts are broken when expectations are not met,as simple as that.And please don’t illusion yourself that yours never did.(If it really NEVER happened,you really NEVER experienced life!)

Truth be told,mine has been broken on various occasions by a host of people.But let’s not get into the details of that.

My point is,which passing heart break,we toughen up.With each passing heart break,we build a level of wall,ordaining our Heart to

1.toughen up,

2.not cut slack easily,

3.if done,be wary,and

4.DO NOT let its guard down easy.

With each heart break,the invisible level increases and we,our true selves are guarded by these hypothetical walls,gradually which start to govern our lives.And then make-belief,befooling others,unconsciously tricking others into believing and we ACTUALLY are that tough and that our system is completely cleansed of vulnerability.Hardly recognizing the brutal fact that our true selves are lost behind these ‘tough’,’unbreakable’ walls.

With all this accumulated pain,we refuse to give our Heart away,we refuse to feel love,because it comes a pricey cost of pain.We refuse to acknowledge what could have been a meaningful relationship just because we could not put our guard down,we did not want to be hurt again.We did not want to risk it again…

And I won’t lie,I am always on guard,these walls have penetrated so deep within my system that most of the times I prefer to let go than hold onto the people who truly matter.Why risk it?Is it worth it?

Frankly,sometimes it wouldn’t be worth the risk.But are we willing to let Pain get the best of us?Should be start assuming that there is ONLY pain,and NO love?

Yes,chances are our Hearts will be broken,expectations shattered,OFTEN,that does not mean we will not experience  kindness,generosity,selflessness and Love.

We cannot let our Heart be spiraled into a trance of hopelessness.

It is easier said than done,I agree,but isn’t Love worth the risk?

 

To me,Love is everything.And totally worth it all.

 

Of Procrastination…

Dear Me/My Mind/My Heart/My Will(Whatever it is that controls it),

Do you not understand,that when I finally sleep at night?I am disappointed with myself,for putting off what I could have accomplished today.

I do sincerely understand,that you are acing it et al.But there are bazillion tasks that are left mid-way,unfinished,unresolved.And yes,you too do not like it.

So,from tomorrow,eerr,I mean today,NOW,do start cooperating with me and lets just be completely glad at sleep time that the day was fully lived.

Thank you,

Much love,

Me.

 

Of Failure and Learning…

Just last week I wrote a post regarding,Failure,and fear of failure.And how this fear hinders a Person’s growth majorly.Today,however,I shall share with you Failure from an all together different perspective.

Failure I have always believed is the essence of Success.Success has no value without it.Just like a Hero no stature without the abhorrent and repugnant Villian,similarly Success would simply have to meaning without Failure.

The key here however is,whether or not we learn from our Failure or not.Do we simply keep on committing the same mistake again and again?And end up whining because we failed to procure the desired result?Every bump on the road has a lesson.In order to equip ourselves with Happiness,we must first and foremost learn from our mistakes and implement the corrections as well.

Also,I read in the Speaking Tree(Courtesy:Times of India),that Failure must be welcome with Open Arms,as we welcome Success.Failure is inapt Guru.It has lessons that Success can never teach.And if we start accepting Failure equally as Success,then we will be able to live a life with unadulterated joy too.=)

Failure also is a sign that further hard work is required for our goal.And if we are dedicated enough the Goal is not merely a distant dream,I believe,it is OURS.And even if it not,in our Hearts we are satisfied that we did the Best we could.
Till tomorrow,

Don’t be disheartened,failure is not an obstacle,but a Guide on this journey called Life.=)

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