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Aam Aurat

Hello My Pretty Pretty Lovelies Out There,

First of all I would like to take this opportunity and wish all my lovely ladies out there a Belated Happy Women’s Day. That being said throughout my adolescence I haven’t really been a big fan of the day. Don’t get me wrong, I am all for ‘women empowerment’ but to designate one mere day to celebrate women according to me is an abysmal travesty. But then I realized in India there are plenty festivals which involve worshiping Goddesses and that too seems  an aspirational   ‘women empowerment’ module. Well of sorts. I deduce that I have met my predicament half way and say that this is an opportunity to assign one specific day to celebrate womanhood.

I think that settles my introspective debate I keep having.

Women today across most sectors are pioneering cult personalities and paving  a way for us to assimilate into what I’d like to call ‘the man’s world’. Most of these keys figures have had to push and shove and reach where they have while in tandem juggling with their family lives. I have been working for what, a year now, and boy oh boy, has the work taken a toll on my life. I am physically incapable of taking care of myself after work. I CRAVE weekends to get household chores done. While these women not only struggled their way through careers, most of the times being mocked and scoffed at, while also sustaining an equilibrium at the home front.Kudos to you.

Lots to learn from them I must say.

While that is the bright side of the day, these are also the times where I hear and read more rampantly about rape cases then I did probably 10 years ago. One particular case that got my attention was of a 15 year old girl who was raped and then set on fire. When I read about it, I was utterly speechless and dumbfounded. I had enraged beyond human comprehension and I wondered what happened to the Justice Verma recommendations which were proposed after the Nirbhaya incident? What happened to the zeal and enthusiasm of the common folk with which they revolted against barbaric and archaic rape laws in our country? Had that fervor subdued over the incessant repetitiveness  of such ‘cases’. I suppose that is what it has become today: ‘a case’.

I think what bugs me more is when I hear “Bhagwaan ka shukar hai mere saath nahi hua/humaari beti ke saath nahi hua” or the self-confessed intellectuals conveniently turning a blind eye towards news like this. I mean for me at the least, whenever I read or hear about such news, I feel someone has mentally raped me, I feel as though someone has mentally stripped me naked and subjected me to a violent act of mental rape,’cause this X person has. He has scarred me.He is scarring me.

And here I am celebrating Women’s Day. While I could be ‘doing something’ about sociopaths like these. I feel at a crossroad on most days when I think of this issue frankly. On one hand, the women force in India is progressing forward shoulder to shoulder with men while there is this issue where the women in the society endure regressive pressure of tradition, customs and such injustice. (Yes! I would like to bracket some of these redundant traditions and customs with the injustice of rape.)

Why do we go to temples when we do not worship the ‘Devis’ residing in our homes? Why do we call ‘Bhaarat’ our ‘Mata’ when we treat Her with utter disrespect? Why do we talk of being protective of our mothers, daughters and sisters when we disrespect the mothers, daughters and sisters of others? Why?

I think I would like to partially blame patriarchy here. We are all victims of it. We think that albeit a woman is working it is HER fundamental duty to the chores at home. We think albeit she is making money, she should not be making MORE money than the boy/husband she is with. We think that after producing a child, it is HER fundamental duty to put her career rust in sabbatical. While on the same hand we also think that MEN should be fundamental strong and care-takers. We also think that MEN should not be emotional and shedding tears qualifies as ‘sissy/feminine’ behavior. We also think that MEN sharing their feelings conveniently retrogrades them as ‘weak individuals.’ We think that MEN are the bread-winners while the women are the ‘HOME-MAKERS’. WE DECIDE THESE ROLES. Does a child through his/her formative years know that he/she is a he/she? We make him/her a him or a her. I think this archaic parameter of role definition and corresponding ‘Sanskar-ism’ based on the gender should be done away with. We need to teach our kids to be good human beings firstly before we define them based on their gender. I think that is enough gyaan for the day. Ain’t it?

Well, that being said,  I would like to end this post by raising a toast to all those lovely ladies out there struggling to define themselves as (primarily as) people in this vastly divided world (primarily based on gender, then religion, caste, creed, state, class etc) and to all the men out there aspiring to be emotionally sensitive (in their own funky ways). To all of you celebrating the ‘Aam Aurat’ : Cheers for better times to come. Here’s to hoping of a ‘Bharat Mata’ living up to the great burden of Her Name.
Cheers.

Baby,I Love You!

Ah!I wish I could have patented February as the Love month.Alas!the hibernation ruined the entire plan.Anyhow.This post is dedicated to the One Soul in my Life who loves me unconditionally.

Even before I begin,let me briefly explain this theory of mine,I am not a believer of Unconditional Love.Because Love according to me is NEVER Unconditional.How?The condition to spend time together/to sacrifice/to be faithful et cetra,the fundamentals of a relationship thrive on conditions.So juxtaposing Unconditional against Conditional Love,practically speaking,Conditional will be my pick.

But this One,particularly,loves me unconditionally still.Every time I look into those puppy dog eyes,the naive and unconditional love spurring through them always bring a smile to my face.The One being who manages to cheer me up in the worst of time.Takes my tantrums and even loves me nonetheless.Never have I witnessed Him reciprocating the angst that I thrust upon Him so conveniently in many of my Bad Days.He welcomes the tired Me with a smile and a Hug.And only wants a smile in return.

And even though it has merely been three years with Him,the entire lifetime seems incomplete without Him.

I love you my Zookey.Just always be in my life.

I am attaching a few pictures from his childhood,don’t have too many from the present days,he is camera-shy and allergic to shutterbugs.(Or at least that is my excuse for Him breaking every camera that tries to immortalize him!)

First slumber at home

"All I Wanna Do is Sleep!Sleep!Sleep!"

"And Once I am Up,Eat,Drink and Play!"

He was Playing with the Bottle Here

15 Day Old Zuke=As Big as my Sister's petite hand.

l’amour/liebe/amore/pyaar/love

Love!

Yes!I intended to pen down this post on Valentines,but my inertness is well,overpowering.(trying to lessen it though!).Anyhow,back to the point.

Love!

May it be the heart-shaped candy boxes to red roses,perfect Valentines Day present,or a simple dinner with your spouse,this time around everyone pines on making their loved ones feel special.For me,it is a celebration of love itself.From family to friends to the beau,for me it is about appreciating the loved ones,who love me regardless of my flaws.Those who stuck by through thick and thin.And Valentines is yet another reason to express my bountiful love for them.=).

The title is a catalog of the languages I can translate the English love to.Why?Ah!The lesson beckons.

Amidst the chaos engulfing the political fronts,let us take time to realize that love expressed in all languages has a similar intention.It is a beguile feeling,that engulfs all pain and hurt.It simply expresses the joy one feels in the presence of the other(may it be your spouse/family/friends/pet et cetra).Moreover love exudes a language of its own,it yields patience,forgiveness,trust,faith,courage and hope.Love transcends over the man-made boundaries and provides for the believers a reason for a Better Place,a Happier Residence without the restrictions of boundaries,castes,creed,color,gender.Utopia you call it?

Well,I derive my Hope from Love.And to all,I wish,A Very Loved Life.=)

Because I Am Not Well…

…So today I am simply going to leave you with a thought to ponder over,do you love yourselves completely?Don’t tell me,it’s for you.And if don’t,then question yourself?Why?Your flaws?If you don’t like something,work on it,and if it is irreparable,then accept it.

Remember,it is an amalgamation of these flaws and the virtues you possess that make the unique individual called you.=)

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